40lbs..

That's right..I've lost -40 lbs! I'm not sure when I mis calculated but last week I said I had lost -38... But it was more like 36...in my defense I am terrible with math!! I can for real without any doubts say that I have officially lost -40lbs!! This amazes me especially when I am on day 22 of menstrual cycle! I know that is crazy but I went to the doc last week and she has given some medication to stop the bleeding but so far it has not helped..I'm supposed to call doc back Monday if It still hasn't stop by then!! Overall I am feeling pretty good and i am just trying to balance this new life along with everything else that is are going on! I'm constantly trying to make healthier decisions besides just eating healthy and exercise....I'm also parking a little farther away...taking the stairs...riding my stationary bike while watching my tv shows...etc!!! The big news is that I finally ran on the treadmill for the very first time ever!! I was nervous and scared to do it...I was afraid I would fall off or that others around me would say bad things..but it wasn't so bad...I did it alomNg with the C25K..so it was only 60 seconds at a time and I only did 3 of the 8 runs..actually running!! But it empowered me to keep trying it!! Ok one last note...I just finished a very emotional Dr. Oz about women who are struggling with aneroxia..it was very sad, and disturbing!! Dr. Oz started off by saying,"when was the first time someone told you that you were fat?". This got me to thinking..again about my childhood..I honestly don't remember ever being made fun of as a kid and I've been chunky since I was between 2 and 4!! I can remember there were kids that were a lot smaller than me but still considered to be "pleasantly plumb" That got hassled and teased all the time for their weight!! I don't know why I was never picked on....I've thought about it a lot maybe it was because I was such a confident person that they knew their negative words would not effect me or maybe they did but I blocked it out..or maybe since I was such a "good" "nice" girl they couldn't make fun of me..but I really don't know!! I think the first oerson to ever tell em i was fat wqs an adult! I think i was seriously an adult before I thought I might have a weight problem!! I found that adults were much more judgmental and eager to let you know that you are up to par!!! It took me 8 years to finally make this hard decision...I realized I couldn't lose the weight on my own and that I needed to be healthy.And .fertility problems eventually sealed the deal for me! Through prayer and God's mercy..this thought finally became a reality!! But...... I say all this to say..those sweet ladies with anorexia break my heart...and even though I am so happy and pleased to have lost 40 lbs so far and I went through drastic measures to do it...in comparison to anorexia..I would choose to weigh 357...any day instead!!